Letters to Our Children | April 2014

Blaison, Kade and Kellan...Today I write this after the loss of a great man that loved you more than you will ever know....and it's one of the hardest things ever to watch that slip away from you so soon.  These past few months I've watched one of the strongest men I know dwindle away to something I'd never thought I would have to see, so frail and weak....On a day filled with many tears and such heartache I want to leave you with the memories....memories that you may not remember when you have children of your own.  Today, I want to provide you the memories of him that you will carry with you throughout your lives to share with the people that matter most to you.  Both you and your great grandfather deserve just this.Blaison, though you weren't as close as most to your Paw Paw GG, these last few months you two found something that interested you both.  Your love for track and the conversations you two had was one of the greatest things to watch unfold.  He was so incredibly proud of you and your ability to take on new things.  Your smarts, your kind heart and your beautiful smile was just a few of the things that he loved most.  He was so proud to see the big brother you had become, taking on not one but TWO baby brothers in such a short time and providing them with such protection and love.  I want you to know that at a time when things weren't the best for you. and you too little to understand, he did everything in his power to protect you.  He fought long and hard to make sure you were in the right hands and in a place that you deserved to be.Kade, oh Kade...You were your Paw Paw GG's blonde haired blue eyed little boy.  Born on his father's birthday, we were told you were destined to be a great human being.  You spent so many days toddling throughout his office, walking into meetings with that bright smile making his day just that much better.  You loved your Paw Paw GG with an open heart sharing anything with him.  This time last year, I can remember celebrating your baby brother's arrival.  Your Maw Maw and Paw Paw GG were both there.  You walked in the back door (with not a clue that they were there), ice cream in hand straight to him and gave him the biggest kiss ever.  Then another.  You shared SO many kisses with him and even was willing to share some of that thumb every now and then ;)   I watched your beautiful smile light his days over the past few months and am so thankful for those moments.Kellan, as of now you are the youngest of great grand children.  Although you will never remember the little time spent with your Paw Paw GG, I want you to know that just those few moments I will hold close to my heart for ever.  Just a few days ago during a visit, you shared such a special time with him.  You gave him the biggest of smiles, he tickled your foot a bit and you gave to him an even bigger smile showing him those big dimples and warming the room just that much more.  The wink he gave you after that smile, I will have instilled in me forever.You are three of 14 great grandchildren, all loved just as much as the other by him.  I can say that he was one of the proudest great grandfather's I knew, bragging on every single one of you whenever he was given the chance.  He cherished every moment with each of you, never letting a time spent with you pass by him.  Weather it was a ride around the farm, an in depth talk about track, or even a tickle of the foot...every single moment with you he loved.Though you are all too young to truly understand what has left us, you need to know he was the rock of this family....a man that was there for every single one of us in times of need...the man that held us all together as a family.  Your great grandfather was nothing short of great and this, I want you to keep with you through life.  I want all three of you to do such great things as he did...live life with a drive and motivation...put your education first...work hard to earn what you deserve...but most importantly I want you to be the rock for your own families.  I know all three of you will do great things, making him so proud of each of you.To my sweet boys, please know that he is still here for you.  He is here to talk to, to guide you through life...he is here no matter what watching over each of you as he did before.  My one wish is that you keep close to him, let him know you love him and that you haven't forgotten.I love you all,Mamma